Words, Climaxes, and... More Words

 *Big sigh*

So we are already nearing the middle of December. The original goal of this year was to write book one, and at least get a feel for book two. I did that and wrote pretty much all of book two. Now I'm in the throws of trying to tie it neatly together, STILL with the goal of finishing it before year's end. I REALLY don't want to go into 2021 without at least the drafted ending of book two. Why? Because that's what I did on the VERY first draft of book one 7-8 years ago (which again, is notably different than it is now). Also, because I have a tendency to want to finish things in a nice, neat little manner and am afraid that if I leave it hanging, I won't come back to it. (Ironically, sometimes tying it off neatly then leaves me in a state of staring at the blank page with a blank look like, "Oh, great, well how do I start another chapter/book now? It would've been better if I just let it ramble right on into the next thing..." [and, fun fact, the first draft way back when and this year had hardly any chapters at all because of this same issue... This will be remedied in the editing process)

*flails hands* Poppycock! Lord knows how much work I have to do, and much of the work won't just be simple revision, but will adding things, tweaking things, possibly with butterfly effects, and, very likely and also hopefully, elimination.

I saw this meme the other day. Suffice it to say that this is basically where I'm at and how I feel about the situation:

Yar!

So anyway. As a part of this desire to wrap things up nice and neat, I tend to ramble (if you haven't caught onto that yet). I can tell that in the current scene I'm working on that it was beginning to drag. That means that likely much of the word count I've been banging out this last week will be... well, deleted. But that's okay! It's part of the process. I'm more concerned about the progress of the plot. I don't want to be a rambling author, and I also don't want to be so abrupt as to leave the reader wanting. Maybe wanting in a desirous, anxious, squirm in your seat with anticipation type of way, but not in a disgruntled and lacking sort of way.

Which, while it was begin to drag, has now, of course, begun to take off and my Muse is spinning ideas and possibilities, and NOW, lovely as that is (I loathe when she's quiet), now I'm concerned on how to close this book and begin the third. The way book one ended and book two began was more like me sitting there going, "Oh, dang, this is long. Okay, well, yeah, the book could probably end here, because like, this happened and then this happened, and now they're here, and they're getting ready to do this, and good GOSH that's a big word count, so yeah, definitely. Okay, ending it... *types quick little scene* ... and now moving on." So. Is that how this book will end too? Fine by me; it'd take the stress out of it. 

BUT! Since then, I've been doing research on the LENGTH of books. Now, looking at them right now, even if I didn't delete a word (hahaha, SO many will be deleted), I would be 100k or more above the highest recommended word count for a first-time fantasy author. BUT! When you convert the word count into book pages, it fits into the Fellowship of the Ring, Game of Thrones, Eye of the World, Name of the Wind, etc, all the books mine liken to. So... is it really too long? Probably not, but I know myself, and I know there are parts I'll be needing to yank out. That said, I really don't want to make the books so long that when I go to do that, it's going to be a total re-write.

So NOW, in place of just writing my book (as my Muse now is desiring to do -- yay!), I'm worried about the word count. And to put it in laymen's terms: it's effing me up! Book two is already just as long as book one and I'm still in the falling action. I'm trying to get into the resolution, but looking at where it is and what needs to happen and how it's developing, I have no idea if that resolution will come in 1000 words or 5000. *pulls hair* It's almost like because she (my Muse) knows I'm trying to wrap it up, she's going to dick with me and just start prattling. A great thing to have happen, but how long is this going to be!?

Now. Fellow writers may understand that fretting about length in regards to the creative process can sometimes -- most of the time -- be absolutely useless. I've fretted about how to get from this point to that point and I just KNEW it was going to take pages to get there, and then my Muse goes, "Welp, did ya think about putting this here and having this person do that? Because, here, give me the keyboard, if you just... Voila!" and then that transition I was so fretting over gets done in, oh... a paragraph. (But if you had asked me at the start of that writing session if I knew that was going to happen... no. No, I didn't.)

*deep breath*

Okay; so, 2021 will be the year of editing. I will very likely be working on book three as well, but I really do need to flesh out all the nitty gritty details of books one and two before moving too far forward in the plot in case there are some MASSIVE holes that have some re-DONK-ulous butterfly effects.

So how do I tie this off?! Here is a very vague summary of how the last 1-2 weeks' worth of writing sessions have gone, to give you a better idea of my distress:

This happened, this this, then I was concerned about how to do the climactic scene towards the end, thought I wrote it, then, then found out that, oh, no, that was just the final part of the rising action, and now THIS is the climax, and how the hell do I write a compelling climax, and why is this freaking me out? But oh, look, okay, the Muse is taking over -- thanks, Muse -- and oh, yeah, that's actually a cool climax. Okay, climax done, and oh, what if this happens now, and that'd work nicely, because then that could get them from point A to B, and could add some interesting character development, but it's a good place to do the end of the book, and besides, do I really want to make that character that big of a part in the plot, and what about this other person? And oh, crap, can't forget to go back and touch on what these guys are doing because how long has it been since I've written about them? Oh, just twenty pages. Ha. Yeah, definitely got to revisit them real fast -- maybe? Could I make that an epilogue or a prologue? Does that count as part of the word count?

So I guess I'm currently into the falling action now and trying to figure out how to neatly bring on the resolution without adding a TON to the word count. If the rambling of this post is to be any indicator on how that's going... well, pray for me.

My active goal is to bring this falling action into a resolution so I can go onto Christmas break with peace of mind and then shift my focus from creating to editing without too much baggage (while still listening to the Muse and writing regularly). I need to come to grips with the fact that this may mean less writing and more mental planning. As a pantser turned planner, it's boring sometimes, but it really does help create quite a nice little story (*snorts* Little... ha!).

And well, this, too, is certainly long enough. Thank you, ever so much, for choosing to spend your time in within the typhoon of these thoughts. As I flesh out those nitty gritties, I may -- MAY -- just begin to feel comfortable sharing some glimpses into the world that is Liren.

All my love,

J. R. DuBois, frazzled-yet-motivated author